Tag Archives: person

The Booty Call

You may be thinking: “what has this got to do with exercise and mind.” I don’t blame you, it’s a fairly obscure topic, but I think that touching on it here will hopefully open your mind up to the world we live in.

The booty call, or friends with benefits, scares many people. I know it scares me, or has scared me about a few things.

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First off,  having multiple partners is something we’ve all (or most of us) been told is unhealthy and increases your risk of STD’s. This part is obvious. Yes, you can wear a condom, which reduces your risks, but there are many other orifices that STD’s can get transferred in. If you’re sexually active, regardless of how many partners you have, you should be responsible and get at least yearly blood tests done to make sure that you are clean. In most countries, these tests are administered by health clinics, and you just need to get an appointment from the Dr. to go. This is usually got from any drop in center.

Secondly, having somebody that you just call up for some lovin’, does that de-sensitizing people to the beauty of sex, or is it making them appreciate it much more? I am an advocate of love, free love for everyone, but does this also involve sex? I believe that love can be shown in more ways than just sex. So then, why is sex mounted on a pedestal, worshipped from afar?

Thirdly, don’t people say that sex changes everything? If you’re trying to stay friends, what will happen? Or does staying friends matter?

Fourthly, is it good? I know for myself, getting it on isn’t just about getting it on, it’s about that interaction, finding something in that other person, feeling something together that makes it so special. Epic if you will. If you’re just friends, how does that work? Does it feel special, or is it the same feeling you get after unplugging the toilet?

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Do you have some insight for me? Please do share with us in the comments section.

I, myself, am not oblivious to the fact that it could be a good thing, after all sometimes relieving stress, or having somebody to feel and help you balance life could be a great thing, couldn’t it? Sometimes life is just way to busy to start a relationship with somebody just to get those primal desires satisfied. I know as a fact that prostitution has been around for thousands of years, and will no doubt continue due to this very fact of non-committal.

I know that people say its good as long as you start off by making sure you’re both on the same page with it. Making sure that both people are aware that feelings shouldn’t be involved. Does this mean that nobody will get hurt? Or does this mean that it ends when somebody starts to feel more for the other person? I wonder how many couples can say they started off as a booty call, and then moved into a more deeper relationship? Does it last? I feel that most times out of ten, one or both of the people involved will become hurt, especially in the friends with benefits category.

So, I ask you again, how do you feel about a friends with benefits, or booty call? Is it something you have done, or will do again?

Online Relationships

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The age of electronics & communication is upon us whether we choose to embrace that or not. Internet chat rooms, social media sites and instant messaging are all avenues that are used very regularly and by millions of people worldwide.

This isn’t the bad news. The bad news is that many people take advantage of these platforms to create for themselves false identities, friendships based on lies, or even as far as relationships which they have no intention of pursuing in person. Yes, sometimes this doesn’t matter, if both parties involved are aware that this doesn’t matter.

Ok, I will admit, there is an open door thinly veiled with a trust flag that is assumed when working in these circles, and eventually the truth does come out. However, this doesn’t deter or even phase many people. Most people are honest by nature, but there are also some people who hide from society, are afraid of what people will think of their true selves, and decide to deceive.

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In all honesty, this is understandable. The world is a harsh place, and it’s very hard sometimes to deal with society’s scrutiny. But the fact of the matter is that we have to grab life by the balls and live it without fear. That’s just the way it goes. That’s how progress is achieved and the forward direction is perceived.

In my many years online I have been involved in chat rooms, dating sites, social sites, online clubs, web pages, forums, instant messaging, and any other form there is out there. I have had online friendships blossom into real life friendships, I have met significant others online, and I know friends who have married that met first online.

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In all these years I have learned a lot about people and experienced many different types of characters and personalities. But one thing that I have found, in all of this, is that a lot of people don’t take what goes on online seriously. They treat it as an anonymous freak show.

For example, some people will flirt tirelessly with other online friends when they have a significant other in real life. This wouldn’t be a problem if the significant other was aware, or they acted the same around their spouse, but from my experience it’s a major breach of trust in a relationship.

Another example is building relationships. It is very easy to meet many really cool people online or at least for me it has always been so. Over time you grow friendly, and sometimes intimate with these people, and want to take things to the next step, which is when things get funny. Excuses’ start falling like apples in the fall, unexpected trips, work overtime, etc. and time keeps slipping by in a more sickening and saddening direction.

This is the horror that you hear about when people bad talk online activities because most people fear what they don’t know. Is this person a fake?

IIt’s extremely frustrating. It’s like you can see the future, you’ve planned the future, and everything was ok until it comes time to actually meet, at which time everything turns sour and the masks come off and the ugly beast rears its head.

Another example is when you’ve been building a relationship with somebody for a few months (or years) and suddenly one day they just off and leave, never to be seen or heard from again.

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I’m trying to think about how a person in real life acts, and comparing it to an online person. Maybe it’s just nostalgia, but I feel that class and etiquette are things that should never be left behind. Granted there are some areas of the internet where they explicitly state that class and etiquette should be left at the door, but were ignore those areas for they are special cases.

So how do we act in real life? Do we tell our friend(s) that we’re getting close and intimate with that they mean a lot to us, and then up and disappear one day? I suppose there is some of us do this.

Do we flirt shamelessly with every passing interest and act completely sober when with our significant other? Once again, I suppose there are some of us who do this in real life.

Do we make plans to show up for a date, and then not show? I suppose there are also some out there who also do this.

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I guess what the major difference is that in real life, we actually had to meet the person, face to face, to have started the relationship we have built with that person. Whereas online, it’s a different world. We don’t have to shake hands or hug anybody, we don’t have to keep eye contact, we don’t have to keep our attention focused on them, and we can browse any random webpage we like when talking with them. We don’t even have to show them a picture of ourselves in lots of situations, though the online world is becoming more visual by the second.

So I guess what the moral of this story is, is that no matter which avenue we decide to walk down to create friendships, one should always keep in mind to be honest, sincere, and oneself. Ethics play a major role in ensuring that in real life, or online, a person acts with respect and sincerity.

Have you ever had a situation like this happen to you? How have you dealt with it?

What advice do I have if you’ve become a victim? I will steal a quote from a friend:

“Destiny” is a result of choice. You’re destined to do something only if you choose to. That all depends on your journey. So the “journey” foreshadows our destiny…but ultimately we make the choice whether or not we stay in flow / on track.